Men are not all narcissists!

blue_abstract_wallpaper-800x600I read many quotes and like many others I am scouting for a quick fix of motivational medicine on a daily basis. I find it astonishing that the number of quotes that make me feel like a narcissistic male. I did some research and found that for every 30 quotes on Pinterst, stating the narcissist was a male there was one that would be general he/she. I actually found 1 in 50 to be specifically about women. Maybe, its because they are being designed and published by women from their perspective… but the traits are unisex and this should be made clear.


Men or Women can be

  • paternal
  • hard working
  • have integrity
  • be sensitive

and believe it or not sometimes both have the capability to tell lies, deceive, manipulate and can also make mistakes!


Surely as children we demand and try to persuade our parents to get what we want, is it not a case that we all have these traits and it is to what degree that you chose to exercise them and your morals, integrity and honour permit you to.


We live in a society where everything needs to be categorised and put into its correct folder. Like a large computer, society sorts through each human entity and decides the file name and where to store it. I imagine in the future you will have to be very careful what you say as it will be immediately analysed by some voice recognition software (Is this my paranoia talking) and you will be categorised before you can process your words.


I am no expert by a long way but surely relationships are give and take, breakdowns occur for various reasons and some scars heal while others remain like a permanent tattoo.  Actually you could laser remove the permanent tattoo (or change the initials if it kind of matches)  but the emotional wounds will remain. Society is teaching us to be intolerant to anything that does not conform to the new status quo and we need to be careful.

B0007066 Memory
B0007066 Memory Credit: Neil Webb. Wellcome Images Illustration showing the number of different processes carried out by the human brain on an daily basis. The brain is responsible for all cognitive function including calculation, learning and memory, path finding and landmark recognition, logical thinking etc. Digital artwork/Computer graphic 2008 Published: – Copyrighted work available under Creative Commons by-nc-nd 2.0 UK, see


Time inherently collects our emotional scars and over a longer period they become apparent. We store them from interactions with one another and this is all happening subconsciously. The memory calls on them when there is a universal connection occurring and they become relevant and meaningful again. The recurrence can be activated from repeat feelings, sounds, smell anything. Just like smelling something that you used to eat as a child and getting nostalgic.


As Steve Jobs said “We can only join the dots looking back and not forward”.  A strong relationship requires tolerance and acceptance of each other good or bad. I write this thinking I must be a narcissist for writing it… am I… I don’t know. You tell me! I have tried to be the best I can be and my biggest failure is putting others first rather than my self. Is it wrong to be selfless? Society is telling us to be selfish and I am sure the selfless people are the ones that make the world go round.


Maybe 20mg Selfless and 20mg Selfish will do the trick! Do we all need therapy, medication or simple dose of good old fashioned tolerance for one another and understanding for each others feelings.






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